Viking, the Misnomer that Keeps on Giving

mis·no·mer –noun 1. a misapplied or inappropriate name or designation. 2. an error in naming a person or thing.

Doing research online is lame. Nothing is certain and facts can be made to suit one's will at random. I could write about whole tribes of lesbian Vikings and somebody will quote me in a paper. It's gotten that absurd. It's like all the tools have been let loose out of the shed, running around out there on the Internet stealing each other's ideas. I mean, think about it. For a typical book to get published it has to go through so many editors, and it's still chalk full of errors. Now any idiot like me can try to build with an empty bag of nails, and kids today use the Internet as the blocks for their 'research'. Kids today, I act like I am eighty. My partner is senior to me in technical years, but I am the elder in reality.

So I'm knocking around with a vague Viking obsession, debating how far to take this thing. It all started because we went to see the movie Beowulf. Now, as you can tell from my posts, many of my thoughts have been sexy recently. I think it's because we are trying to get pregnant, and for me, attempting pregnancy in itself so far isn't sexy. I haven't felt too sexy. But our next appt isn't until January (we are being referred to a specialist- it's a long depressing story), so a window of sexiness has opened. Also, the holidays are kind of sexy too. It's all the tinsel and razzle dazzle. But I digress. Back to the Vikings.

The movie was good. Allot of other people didn't enjoy it, as much as I think it deserves to be liked, but we loved it. We never go to the movies that much, but we went to see it twice in 3D. The character of Beowulf had this transgendered look to me (don't ask- that's a post in itself, seriously, there are men I find attractive because they are just feminine enough, but not girly. The character of Beowulf was nice and blonde and hairless, tough, but troubled too, just enough to appeal to me. Men like Brad Pitt. I think my partner looks like Brad's transgender sibling. Again, a post in itself.) Angelina Jolie wasn't hard on the eyes either, but I was surprised by how little she had to do with the enjoyment of this film. She was our original interest in seeing it, as we are both big brad 'n angies.

The imagery! The folklore! The story! All really good. Well, it got me thinking about when I was little and played with the Viking Lego sets. You know how a little fact can sit in your brain, and even though weeks can go by, you can't let it go? That's what's happening for me regarding the truth over who 'discovered' America.

Of course, this all need to be prefaced by the fact that you can't discover a place where people already are living, but besides that, the hypocrisy over Columbus discovering America! The Vikings were here first!

The word Viking was never truly applied by the people themselves. It was applied later by others to describe them. The word Viking is Scandinavian for 'pirate'. From my amateur research it appears we know very little about these people, other than the fact that they were a fierce people, depicted as blondes and redheads. From what movies show us they were a very sexy group indeed. Geez, I am getting sexy on this blog again. I really don't mean to, I can't help it. You see, I am fascinated by the Vikings right now. One site describes the women as 'among the world's most beautiful, whether slim or zaftig, blond or dark-haired, with perfect rainy-weather complexions. They have been independent thinkers for centuries. Gunnora Hallakarva, who researched Viking attitudes toward women, explained that "if a husband complained of his wife's lesbian relationship, she could simply divorce him."Yet Icelandic women were legally barred from dressing like men and restricted from taking men's jobs. Still, Icelandic history is replete with legends about women, like the 17th-century orphan who not only dressed as a man and went to sea with men but ended up captaining her own herring boats, which conferred high status. She married several men for children, divorcing them after the children were born, and lived happily alone. She was called "kynvilla, or 'perverted,' " ' http://www.outtraveler.com/detail.asp?did=306

Like most histories, queer Viking history is a wasteland with little evidence to go on. But just enough for me to dig in and recreate my own to post on the Internet as truth.